If you have been reading these blogs and you've stayed
with me so far, today's topic will be an even greater challenge than the
previous one "The End of Self." Today's topic is a difficult topic and
one that is often over-looked if not ignored altogether amongst
Christians. But because we are called to
be holy and live righteous lives for Christ's sake, it is something we need to
look at and not ignore. I am talking
about rebuking someone (or being rebuked) for something significant they've
done or keep doing that goes against Scripture.
How do we know when a rebuke is necessary? It is when we have done something
Scripturally wrong and in many cases will continue to do it even though we may
already know it is wrong. It can be and
will be potentially damaging to a Christian testimony and to that of others
and/or a whole body of believers,
sometimes in a church setting, and it will need to be dealt with before too much
damage is done. Most importantly, it
deflects the glory away from God and inhibits Him from freely working through
the unsanctified (and sometimes unrepentant) believer, namely to reach the lost
and to build up the Body of Christ. It
may mean a behavior that is not Christ-like such as, for example, stealing,
lying, cheating, or spreading gossip.
Or, it may be bitterness and anger towards someone, refusing to forgive
them. All of Ephesians 4 is worth
reading, but these are our instructions regarding Godly conduct and attitude:
Eph 4:22 That ye
put off concerning the former conversation [life] the old man, which is corrupt
according to the deceitful lusts;Eph 4:23 And be renewed in the spirit of
your mind;Eph 4:24 And that ye put on the new man, which after God is
created in righteousness and true holiness.Eph 4:25 Wherefore putting away
lying, speak every man truth with his neighbour: for we are members one of
another.Eph 4:26 Be ye angry, and sin not: let not the sun go down upon your
wrath:Eph 4:27 Neither give place to the devil.Eph 4:28 Let him that
stole steal no more: but rather let him labour, working with his hands the
thing which is good, that he may have to give to him that needeth.Eph 4:29
Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good
to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers.Eph 4:30
And grieve not the holy Spirit of God, whereby ye are sealed unto the day of
redemption.Eph 4:31 Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour,
and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice:Eph 4:32 And be ye
kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for
Christ's sake hath forgiven you.
It could be an action that goes directly against
Scripture, like having sex before marriage, and in the case of Christians doing
this, continuing to attend church and participate as if nothing is wrong,
rather than do the right thing and stop, or get married first. There are several different passages dealing
with fornication, but I will share this one:
Eph 5:3 But fornication, and all uncleanness, or
covetousness, let it not be once named among you, as becometh saints;
Now at this point, it would be easy to read this and
think to ourselves that these are some pretty outdated ideas. After all, nobody's perfect. That may be true, but when we see our brother
stumble and fall, do we not care enough about them to try and help them? And do we not want to live by God's Word and
obey the One who gave His life for us?
For in doing so, we show that we are honoring God and His Word, and we
are also loving our brother or sister. In
fact, God expects it of us. It is
encouraged in His Word:
Luk 17:3 Take
heed to yourselves: If thy brother trespass against thee, rebuke him; and if he
repent, forgive him. [Jesus' own words]
Mat 18:15
Moreover if thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault
between thee and him alone: if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy
brother.Mat 18:16 But if he will not hear thee, then take with thee one or
two more, that in the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be
established.Mat 18:17 And if he shall neglect to hear them, tell it unto the
church: but if he neglect to hear the church, let him be unto thee as an
heathen man and a publican.
Eph 5:11 And
have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness, but rather reprove
them.
Here we have it again, only this time, it shows the kind
of attitude we need to have when we "instruct" those that are in
error.
2Ti 2:24 And the
servant of the Lord must not strive; but be gentle unto all men, apt to teach,
patient,2Ti 2:25 In meekness instructing those that oppose themselves; if
God peradventure will give them repentance to the acknowledging of the
truth;2Ti 2:26 And that they may recover themselves out of the snare of the
devil, who are taken captive by him at his will.
If we know the Word well, we are to preach it, use it to
reprove, rebuke and exhort.
2Ti 4:2 Preach
the word; be instant in season, out of season; reprove, rebuke, exhort with all
longsuffering and doctrine.
Elders are instructed to rebuke those in error when
necessary:
Tit 1:9 Holding
fast the faithful word as he hath been taught, that he may be able by sound
doctrine both to exhort and to convince the gainsayers.Tit 1:10 For there
are many unruly and vain talkers and deceivers, specially they of the
circumcision:Tit 1:11 Whose mouths must be stopped, who subvert whole
houses, teaching things which they ought not, for filthy lucre's sake.Tit 1:12
One of themselves, even a prophet of their own, said, The Cretians are alway
liars, evil beasts, slow bellies.Tit 1:13 This witness is true. Wherefore
rebuke them sharply, that they may be sound in the faith;
Now that we know it is expected that there may be times
we need to be rebuked or a fellow Christian does, we need to discuss the
fall-out that can happen when this occurs.
An immediate reaction we may have if we are NOT open to rebuke,
admonishment or honest reproach from a fellow Christian is that we immediately
get our back up and think, "Well who do you think you are to tell me what
sin I have in my life?" We might feel judged and then wonder how they could
do this to us since they're not perfect either.
True enough. None of us are perfect, but still, if Scripture admonishes
us to rebuke when necessary, than we must obey the Lord and do so, and not be
afraid of man. Let me put it another
way, if we witness to a non-Christian friend that they must be saved by the
work that Jesus did on the cross and their own works are not good enough, what
do we do if they get mad at us? Do we
fail to tell them the truth that they're going to hell if they don't repent and
turn to Jesus because we are afraid they won't like us any more? If we don't
say something, then aren't we responsible for failing to warn them of what lies
ahead if they don't repent? And if we
also neglect to rebuke a fellow Christian, aren't we also responsible for
winking at sin even though the Bible clearly condemns practicing the sins of
the flesh for a Christian who knows better?
This may seem harsh, yet Scripture teaches that in the
case of Christians who do not receive God's Word or warning, rebuke or
admonition, we are to part company with them:
2Th 3:14 And if
any man obey not our word by this epistle, note that man, and have no company
with him, that he may be ashamed.2Th 3:15 Yet count him not as an enemy, but
admonish him as a brother.
In the following passage, we have very clear instructions
on what to do when someone continues to live in error. It is up to the church to deal with that
person and God expects it or He wouldn't have included it in His Word. Look at verses 12-13, which are saying that
it is up to the church to handle the matter.
1Co 5:9 I wrote
unto you in an epistle not to company with fornicators:1Co 5:10 Yet not
altogether with the fornicators of this world, or with the covetous, or
extortioners, or with idolaters; for then must ye needs go out of the world.1Co
5:11 But now I have written unto you not to keep company, if any man that is
called a brother be a fornicator, or covetous, or an idolater, or a railer, or
a drunkard, or an extortioner; with such an one no not to eat.1Co 5:12 For
what have I to do to judge them also that are without? do not ye judge them
that are within?1Co 5:13 But them that are without God judgeth. Therefore
put away from among yourselves that wicked person.
Now let's look at what would be an ideal response when we
are confronted with a rebuke from someone or what, ideally, their response to
the rebuke should be if we are doing the rebuking.
Rebuking someone in an attitude of Christian love wins in
the end:
Pro 28:23 He that rebuketh a man afterwards shall find
more favour than he that flattereth with the tongue.
A true friend cares about you and will be honest with
you:
Pro 27:6
Faithful are the wounds of a friend; but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful.
Pro 27:5 Open rebuke is better than secret love.
Another thing is that if they are truly seeking God's
best, they will receive the rebuke as a good thing, but if they are really not
interested in the things of God and how they can please God, they will likely not
receive it, and may even deny that they have done anything wrong.
Pro 9:8 Reprove not a scorner, lest he hate thee:
rebuke a wise man, and he will love thee.
Pro 13:1 A wise son heareth his father's instruction:
but a scorner heareth not rebuke.
If we are the ones being rebuked, as hard as it is, it
comes down to how secure we are in our personal relationship with God. If we are close to Him and want to live a
life that is pleasing to Him, instead of shutting down and being angry at the
person (or even God) for the rebuke, or justifying what we've done, we will not
be offended at all, but determine to straighten things out and make them right
before man and God at the first opportunity.
Psa 119:165
Great peace have they which love thy law: and nothing shall offend them.
And depending on the rebuke and the timing of it, if a
person rebuked is near the end of living a life unto themselves and ready for a
change to grow much deeper in their walk, they will readily repent, forsake the
sin they are being rebuked for, and be all the better for it. They will pray like David:
Psa 51:1 Have
mercy upon me, O God, according to thy lovingkindness: according unto the
multitude of thy tender mercies blot out my transgressions.Psa 51:2 Wash me
throughly from mine iniquity, and cleanse me from my sin.Psa 51:3 For I
acknowledge my transgressions: and my sin is ever before me.Psa 51:4 Against
thee, thee only, have I sinned, and done this evil in thy sight: that thou
mightest be justified when thou speakest, and be clear when thou judgest.Psa
51:6 Behold, thou desirest truth in the inward parts: and in the hidden part
thou shalt make me to know wisdom.Psa 51:7 Purge me with hyssop, and I shall
be clean: wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow.Psa 51:9 Hide thy face
from my sins, and blot out all mine iniquities.Psa 51:10 Create in me a
clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me.
What happens when we confront one another with our
faults? We will be restored into
fellowship with God and fellow believers, and we will be healed.
Jas 5:16 Confess
your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed.
The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much.
Being rebuked or rebuking someone is never easy, which is
why most Christians will not get involved.
We hope that the pastor of the church will preach on it and perhaps the
right people will hear it and forsake their evil ways. But I would think that this rarely
happens. Instead, we need to be honest
with each other and prayerfully consider what might need to be said to them,
then act on it. And if we are the ones
in error who are blessed enough to be rebuked, we need to thank God that we
have been given an opportunity to change and someone cared enough about us to
take the time to talk to us.
